Random Thoughts From a Morning Bike Ride

I'd regularly ride my bike on the sidewalk as my city mandates if:

All drivers backing out of their hidden-by-shrubs driveways would honk before reaching the sidewalk;

All pedestrians would keep a heads-up attitude so as not to leap into my path in fright when I call out, "Passing on the left!";

Other bikers would pick one side of the sidewalk or the other and not choose the middle;

The city would mandate tree branches be trimmed to above head level;

All pedestrians walking their pets would keep a heads-up attitude so their dog doesn't leap into my path in fright with teeth bared when I call out, "Passing on the left!";

Pet-owners would not let their dogs leave "gifts" in the middle of the sidewalk;

Sidewalks were free of root-heaving and the grass alongside was trimmed so the drop between grass and cement was visible;

Drivers would yield to bikers in crosswalks;

Drivers would yield to bikers in crosswalks without dropping the F-bomb;

Drivers intending to turn into their driveway would keep a heads-up attitude and notice when I am in the middle of crossing said driveway;

Children would learn that walking three abreast in front of me when I'm pedaling at 15 mph will result in them becoming the human equivalent of bowling pins in front of a strike-bound ball;

Parents who are walking with children holding ice-cream cones would discourage their children from attempting to share said ice cream "as a surprise" with a passing biker.

All of the above?

Priceless.